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Automobile Fittings
一、
Automobile Fittings
A lorry driver makes inquiry of a mountaineer :" Excuse me, where can I buy the auto accessories (配件,幫兇) in the neighborhood ?" Mountaineer says:" Some people usually drive heroic car on the road .There is a abrupt turn ahead not far from here, and a clough(峽谷，深谷) just below it, where you can find all kinds of the auto accessories . You will spend no money at all."
一個卡車司機向一山民打聽：“請問，這附近哪兒能買到汽車配件?” 山民說：“這條路上經常有人開英雄車，前面不遠處是個急轉彎，急轉彎的下面就是深谷，那深谷里什么樣的汽車配件都有——根本用不著花錢。”
二、
At Auction Fair
At auction spot, someone has lost a bag, in which has the vital document. The owner says:" Once who picked it up brings it to me, I will take out 200 dollars to remunerate (re`munerate與reward近意：酬勞，酬報 ) him or her." On hearing the news ,another chap shouts out:" I reward 300 dollars."
拍賣會上，有人的包丟了，里面裝有重要文件。物主說：“有誰揀到送還，我將拿出200美元以表酬謝。”話剛出口，就聽有人喊：“我出300美元。”
三、
Another Engine Is Down
A Boeing 747 was flying in the night sky of the Pacific Ocean. The captain got on the loud speaker:" Travellers, one of our engines was out of order , therefore we’ll arrive in Tokyo an hour late ." After a short while, the trumpet (喇叭)rang out again:" Everybody, the second one of our four engines went wrong, we will reach Tokyo late three hours as a result." At this time, the passengers started disturbance(騷動，動亂). Someone said:" In case another engine is down again , we’ll be up here all night." Moreover, a chap got to shouting unendurably:" I do not choose to take your awful airplane any longer, let me get off quickly."
一架波音747飛行在太平洋的夜空，喇叭里傳來機長的聲音：“旅客們，我們的一個引擎壞了，因此我們將晚到達東京一個小時。”過了一會兒，喇叭再次響起：“諸位，我們四個引擎中又壞了一個引擎，為此我們將晚到三個小時。”這時，乘客開始騷動。有人說：“萬一再壞一個，我們得呆在天上一整夜了。”還有已經受不了的，大叫：“我再也不坐你們的破飛機了，快讓我下去。”
四、
As If Awakening From A Dream
A competition whose subject is on giving up drinking is proceeding. One of lecturers says excitedly: " Alcohol can break down conjugal (婚姻的，夫妻之間的)relation, even cause your wife to leave you … " A man shouts out at the news : " Give me another bottle of Brandy."
以戒酒為主題的演講比賽正在進行，一個演講者動情地說：“酒精可以破壞夫妻關系，甚至導致妻子離開自己的丈夫……”這時一個男人大聲喊：“再來一瓶白蘭地!”
五、
As the Elegant Demeanor Was
Chaucer was over seventy , but he was not convinced (使信服) of his age. At a time he boasted: “My physical strength is as strong as that I was young.” The opposite person asked: “ What do you rely on? ” Chaucer said : “ There is a big stone roller in my compound. I couldn’t heave it when was young, neither can(倒裝句) I now.”
喬叟年過六旬，仍不服老。一次，他對人夸耀說：“我和年輕時力氣一樣大。”對方問：“何以見得?”喬叟說：“我家大院里有個碌碡，年輕時我舉不起來，現在我還是舉不起來。”