英語小笑話帶翻譯（精選13個）
笑話具有篇幅短小，故事情節簡單而巧妙，往往出人意料，小編為大家準備了英語小笑話帶翻譯，供大家參考閱讀。
英語小笑話帶翻譯 1
好客
由于客人在吃蘋果餡餅時，家里沒有奶酪了，于是女主人向大家表示歉意。這家的小男孩悄悄地離開了屋子。過了一會兒，他拿著一片奶酪回到房間，把奶酪放在客人的`盤子里。 客人微笑著把奶酪放進嘴里說：“孩子，你的眼睛就是比你媽媽的好。你在哪里找到的奶酪?” “在捕鼠夾上，先生�！蹦切∧泻⒄f。
Hospitality
The hostess apologized to her unexpected guest for serving an apple-pie without any cheese. The little boy of the family left the room quietly for a moment and returned with a piece of cheese which he laid on the guests plate. The visitor smiled, put the cheese into his mouth and then said: "You must have better eyes than your mother, sonny. Where did you find the cheese?" "In the rat-trap, sir," replied the boy.
英語小笑話帶翻譯 2
醉酒
一天，父親與小兒子一道回家。這個孩子正處于那種對什么事都很感興趣的年齡，老是有提不完的問題。他向父親發問道：“爸爸，‘醉’字是什么意思?” “唔，孩子，”父親回答說，“你瞧那兒站著兩個警察。如果我把他們看成了四個，那么我就算醉了�！� “可是，爸爸， ”孩子說，“那兒只有一個警察呀!”
Drunk
One day, a father and his little son were going home. At this age, the boy was interested in all kinds of things and was always asking questions. Now, he asked, "Whats the meaning of the word Drunk, dad?" "Well, my son," his father replied, "look, there are standing two policemen. If I regard the two policemen as four then I am drunk."
"But, dad," the boy said, " theres only ONE policeman!"
英語小笑話帶翻譯 3
我沒有把藥吃下去
A fellow who was rather slow on the uptake had been suffering from constipation, so the doctor provided him with some suppositories.
有位理解能力相當遲緩的老兄一直為便秘所苦，因此醫生給他一些利腸的栓劑。
A week later, the patient came back to tell the doctor that his condition had not improved.
一星期后病人回來告訴醫生，他的狀況尚未改進。
"Im amazed," said the doctor. " Have you been taking the medicine I prescribed for you?"
“我覺得好奇怪，”醫生說�！澳阌袥]有采用我開給你的'藥方呢?”
"What do you think Ive been doing, shoving it up my ass?"
“你以為我做什么呢?難道要我把它們都塞進屁股里嗎?”
英語小笑話帶翻譯 4
two brothers were looking at some beautiful paintings.
兄弟倆在看一些漂亮的油畫。
"look," said the elder brother. "how nice these paintings are!"
“看，”哥哥說，“這些畫多漂亮呀!”
"yes," said the younger, "but in all these paintings there is only the mother and the children. where is the father?"
“是啊，”弟弟說道，“可是在所有這些畫中，只有媽媽和孩子。那爸爸去哪兒了呢?”
the elder brother thought for a moment and then explained, "obviously he was painting the pictures."
哥哥想了一會兒，然后解釋道：“很明顯，他當時正在畫這些畫唄�！�
英語小笑話帶翻譯 5
你說什么?
Moe, Larry and Curly had been stranded on a desert island. They were walking alongdisconsolately when Moe happened to kick a bottle lying in the sand. The bottle broke and agenie suddenly emerged before them.
莫伊、賴利和卷毛因船觸礁擱淺而被困在一個無人荒島上，他們寂寞無助地沿岸邊走著，這時莫伊踢到沙灘上一只瓶子，那只瓶子破了后，突然出現一個精靈。
"Thank you. oh Masters, for releasing me from my captivity. For your kindness, please allow meto grant you each a wish. "
“謝謝你們從囚禁我的瓶子中把我放出來，我的`主人。為了報答你們的恩惠，請讓我為每位實現一個愿望�！�
"Well, its not too difficult to figure out what I want," said Moe. "I wish I were back home. "
“哦，我的愿望很容易想出來，”莫伊說。“我希望我能回到家里。”
No sooner had he said the words than he was back in dear old Brooklyn.
話一說完，莫伊就已在他可愛的布魯克林老家中。
"I want to be back home, too," said I Larry, and he, too, was instantly transported.
“我也想回家，”賴利說，他馬上也就被送走了。
" Gee, its alone some here without Moe and Larry," said Curly. "I wish they were here to keepme company. "
“唉，沒有莫伊和賴利，一個人在這里真無聊，”卷毛說�！拔蚁Ｍ麄兡芑氐竭@里陪伴我。”
英語小笑話帶翻譯 6
a doctor came into the hospital ward and said to mr. johnson, "i have some good news and some bad news for you."
一位醫生走進醫院的病房，告訴強森先生：“我有一個好消息和一個壞消息要告訴你。”
then mr. johnson said, "please, give me the good news first."
強森先生說：“請先告訴我好消息吧!”
so the doctor said, "the doctors here are going to name an incurable disease after you."
醫生說：“本院的醫師決定用你的`名字，來為一種不治之癥命名�！�
英語小笑話帶翻譯 7
A young mother believed that it was very wrong to waste any food when there were so many hungry people in the world. One evening, she was giving her small daughterher tea before putting her to bed. First she gave her a slice of fresh brown bread and butter, but the child said that she did not want it like that. She asked for some jam on her bread as well.
一位年輕的母親認為，世界上還有許多受饑餓的'人，浪費食物真不應該。有天晚上，在安排幼小的女兒睡覺之前，她給女兒喂夜宵。她先給她一片新鮮的黑面包和黃油，但孩子說她不喜歡這樣吃。她還要一些果醬涂在面包上。
Her mother looked at her for a few seconds and then said, "When I was a small girl like you, Lucy, I was always given either bread and butter, or bread and jam, but never bread with butter and jam.
母親看了女兒幾秒鐘，隨即說道，“露茜，當我像你一樣小的時候，總是吃面包加黃油，或者面包加果醬，從來沒有面包既加黃油又加果醬�！�
Lucy looked at her mother for a few moments with pity in her eyes and then said to her kindly, "Arent you pleased that youve come to live with us now?"
露茜看了母親一會兒，眼中露出憐憫的神情，然后她柔聲說：“您現在能跟我們生活在一起難道不感到高興嗎?”
英語小笑話帶翻譯 8
The doctor lives downstairs
"Doctor," she said loudly, bouncing into the room, "I want you to say frankly whats wrong with me."
He surveyed her from head to foot. "Madam," he said at length, "Ive just three things to tell you. First, your weight wants reducing by nearly fifty pounds. Second, your beauty could be improved if you used about one tenth as much rouge and lipstick. And third, Im an artist---the doctor lives downstairs."
醫生住在樓下
“醫生”她沖進屋后大聲說道。
“我想讓你坦率地說我到底得了什么病。”
他從頭到腳打量打量她，然后大聲說：“太太，我有三件事要對你說。第一，您的體重需要減少大約50磅；第二，如果您要用上十分之一的`胭脂和口紅，您的美貌將會改變。第三，我是一位畫家——醫生住在樓下�！�
英語小笑話帶翻譯 9
While the doctor was looking over the man, his wife kept fussing(煩躁，發牢騷) andjabbering(快而含糊地說) all the time. The doctor told her: "Your husband must get absolute rest and quiet." Then he left some sleeping pills.
The mans wife asked, "When do I dive them to my husband?" The doctor replied, "No, they are not for him. They are for you. You need them."
有個人生病了。他的妻子請了一位醫生來給他治病。
醫生在給他治療的時候，他的.妻子一直大驚小怪，神神叨叨地緊張不安。醫生對她說：“你的丈夫必須絕對休息和保持安靜�！� 然后他就留下了一些。
她問醫生：“什么時候給我丈夫吃這些藥呀!”醫生回答說：“不用，這些藥不是給他吃的，是給你吃的，你需要。”
英語小笑話帶翻譯 10
After supper, the parents were busy playing mah-jong with the guests. At this point the mother thought of something and said to her son who was watching TV, "Honey, go see if the kitchen light is on or not?"
After a while, her son returned and said, "Ma, the kitchen is so dark that I cannot see it at all."
晚飯后，父親和母親都忙著和客人玩麻將，這時母親忽然想起點兒事來，便對正在看電視的兒子說道：“寶貝，去看看廚房里的燈是不是還開著呢？” 過了一會兒，兒子回來說：“媽，廚房里太黑了，我根本就看不見�！�
英語小笑話帶翻譯 11
She was so excited and anxious to tell him. She said, "Ive bought two presents for your birthday, dear. I would tell you now because I cant wait until that day. One present is a mat to put in front of my dressing table. Another one is a bronze statuette for the drawing room mantelpiece." And then she added: "Now me?"
Her husband thought for a while and then replied: "Id better get you a new razor and some ties, so that we may exchange presents with each other."
有個女人給她的丈夫買了生日禮物。
她很激動，并且急于要告訴她的.丈夫。她說：“親愛的，我買了兩樣東西給你做生日禮物。我現在就要告訴你，因為我等不得到那一天才說。一件禮物是一個地墊，可以放在我的梳妝臺前。另一件是一個青銅的小雕像，可以放在客廳的壁爐架上”她還說：“好啦，你準備給我買什么呢?”
她的丈夫想了一會就說：“我最好是給你買一個刮胡刀和幾條領帶。這樣我們就可以互相交換禮物了�！�
英語小笑話帶翻譯 12
Nurse: Dont you like your new baby sister, Johnnie?
保育員：約翰尼，你難道不喜歡你的小妹妹嗎?
Johnnie: Shes all right, but I wish she had been a boy. Willie Smith had got a new sister, and now hell think Im trying to copy him.
約翰尼：那倒不是。她要是個男孩就好了。威利有了一個新生的小妹妹，現在他該認為我又在學他的'樣子了。
英語小笑話帶翻譯 13
A woman who frequently visited a small antique shop rarely purchased anything，but always found fault with the merchandise and prices. The manager and her salesclerk took the womans grumpy complaints in stride，but one day she went too far. "Why is it I never manage to get what I ask for in your shop?”demanded the woman.
一名婦女經常光顧一家小古董店，但幾乎從不買什么東西，卻總是對商品和價格吹毛求疵。對于那婦女的`粗暴袍怨，經理和她的銷售員總是應付了事，但是有一天她做得太過分了�！盀槭裁茨銈兊昀锟偸遣荒艿玫轿蚁胍臇|西?”那名婦女指責說。
A smile on her face，the clerk calmly replied，“Perhaps its because we’re too polite.”
職員臉上帶著微笑，沉著地回答道:“也許是因為我們太有禮貌了�！�
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