古今英語笑話200字以內
讓我們一同來分享應屆畢業生小編為你準備的英語笑話吧。
A Man Who Said No 說不的男子
A friend of mine noticed a man staggering about in the Times Square subway station. A well-dressed Wall Street type, his coat was unbuttoned, a briefcase dangled from his hand and he'd obviously had one too many.
Asked if he was all right, the man gave a slurred but affirmative response. However, my friend simply could not see someone brave the rough maw of a New York subway without trying to help. He followed the chap, and again asked, "Are you sure you're all right? What subway are you looking for? Do you need help getting home?"
At last, the object of his attentions snarled, in a low voice, "Leave me alone! I'm an undercover cop!"
我的一位朋友看到一個男子在時代廣場的地鐵車站搖搖晃晃地走。那個人穿著時髦,敞著懷,一個手提箱在他的手里懸吊著,很明顯他是多喝了一杯。
我朋友問他怎么樣,那男子含糊而肯定地回答說沒問題。然而我朋友就是不能眼看著有人在紐約地鐵獨入是非之地而置之不顧。他跟在那家伙的后面,又一次問道:“你肯定你沒事?你在找哪個地鐵站?你需要幫忙回家嗎?”
他所注意的對象終于忍耐不住了,對他低聲咆哮道:“你給我走開!我是便衣警察!”
A Gentle Reminder委婉提醒
Having been married a long time, my husband sometimes needs a gentle reminder of a special occasion. On the morning of our 35th anniversary, we were sitting at the breakfast table when I hinted, "Honey, do you realize that we've been sitting in these same two seats for exactly 35 years?"
Putting down the newspaper, he looked straight at me and said, "So, you want to switch seats?"
婚后已久,我丈夫往往在一個特別事情上需要委婉的'提醒。在我們結婚35周年紀念的早上,我們正坐在早餐桌旁,我暗示道:“親愛的,你意識到我們在這兩個相同的座位上已坐了整整35年了嗎?”
他放下報紙,眼睛直直地望著我:“因此,你想交換座位嗎?”
The King's Brother 國王的兄弟
A poor man, presenting himself before the King of Spain,asked his charity, telling him that he was his brother. Theking desiring to know how he claimed kindred to him, the poorfellow replied,“We are all descended from one common fatherand mother—viz., Adam and Eve.” Upon which the kinggave him a little copper piece of money. The poor man beganto bemoan himself, saying,“Is it possible that your Majestyshould give no more than this to your brother?”“Away,away,”replies the king;“if all the brothers you have in theworld give you as much as I have done, you'll be richer than Iam.”
一個窮漢去見西班牙國王,說自己是他的兄弟,求他施恩周濟。國王想知道他何以攀認親戚,窮漢回答說,“我們有共同的祖先——亞當和夏娃。”聽了這話,國王就給了他一個小銅子兒。于是窮人開始叫屈,說:“難道您國王陛下就給兄弟這么一點點錢嗎?”“走開,快走,”國王回答,“如果世界上你所有的兄弟們都像我這樣給你一個銅板,你就比我還有錢了。”
老虎來了
When a Tiger comes Two guys were walking through the jungle. All of a sudden, a tiger appears from a distance, running towards them. One of the guys takes out a pair of "Nikes" from his bag and starts to put them on. The other guy with a surprised look and exclaims, "Do you think you will run faster than the tiger with those?" His friend replies: "I don't have to out run it, I just have to run faster than you."
兩個男人正在穿過叢林,突然,一只老虎出現在遠處,向他們沖來。當中的一個人從包里拿出一雙“耐克”跑鞋,開始穿上。另一個人驚奇地看著他說,“你以為穿上跑鞋就可以跑得過老虎嗎?” 他的朋友回答道:“我不用跑得過它,我只要跑得比你快就行了。”
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