英語笑話大全爆笑故事
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英語笑話大全爆笑故事一:Always Thirsty
"I had an operation," said a man to his friend, "and the doctor left a sponge in me."
"That"s terrible!" said the friend. "Got any pain?"
"No, but I am always thirsty!"
總感到口渴
一個男人對他的朋友說:“我動了一次手術,手術后醫生把一塊海綿忘在我的身體里了。”
“真是太糟糕了!”朋友說道:“你覺得疼嗎?”
“不疼,可是我總感到口渴。”
英語笑話大全爆笑故事二:圖片和奶酪 the picture of the cheese
One day a lady saw a mouse running across her kitchen floor. She was very afraid of mouse, so she ran out of the house, got into a bus and went to the shops. There she bought a mousetrap. The shopkeeper said to her, "Put some cheese in it and you will soon catch that mouse."
有一天某位女士看到一只老鼠在自家的廚房地板上竄過。她很害怕老鼠,所以她沖出屋子,搭上了公共汽車直奔商店。在那兒,她買了一只老鼠夾。店主告訴她:"放點奶酪在里面,很快你就會逮住那只老鼠的。"
The lady went home with her mousetrap, but when she looked in her cupboard, she could not find any cheese in it. She did not want to go back to the shop, because it was very late, so she cut a picture of some cheese out of a magazine and put that in the trap.
這位女士帶著鼠夾回到家里,但她沒有在碗櫥里找到奶酪。她不想再回到商店里去,因為已經很晚了。于是,她就從一份雜志中剪下一幅奶酪的圖片放進了夾子。
Surprisingly, the picture of the cheese was quite successful! When the lady came down to the kitchen the next morning she found a picture of a mouse in the trap beside the picture of the cheese!
令人稱奇的'是,這畫有奶酪的圖片竟然奏效了!第二天早上,這位女士下樓到廚房時,發現鼠夾里奶酪圖片旁有一張畫有老鼠的圖片。
英語笑話大全爆笑故事三:他們很忙 They're Busy
One day, the phone rang, and a little boy answered.
"May I speak to your parents? "
"They''re busy. "
"Oh. Is anybody else there? "
"The police. "
"Can I speak to them?"
"They''re busy. "
"Oh. Is anybody else there? "
"The firemen. "
"Can I speak to them? "
"They''re busy. "
"So let me get this straight -- your parents, the police, and the firemen are there, but they''re all busy? What are they doing?"
"Looking for me. "
電話鈴響了,小男孩接了電話。
“請你父母聽電話好嗎?”
“他們很忙。”
“噢,那家里還有其他人嗎?”
“還有警察。”
“我可以和他們說話嗎?”
“他們很忙。”
“那還有其他人嗎?”
“還有消防員。”
“我可以和他們說話嗎?”
“他們也很忙。”
“請直接告訴我——你的父母、警察和消防員都在你家,但他們都很忙,他們到底在干什么?”
“在找我。”
英語笑話大全爆笑故事四:約會完成進行時 Appointment of the Perfect Continuous
A youngster asks a girl who comes to the date:" Is this your date with the young man for the first time? "
" Too bloody right. Gee, how are you men all always asking this question?"
一個小伙子問前來赴約的女孩:“你是第一次和男孩子約會嗎?”
“那當然了。咦,怎么你們男孩子都愛問這個問題呀?”
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