英文幽默笑話及譯文
你當真愛我嗎？
One day,Eve asked Adam,"Do you really love me?
一天，夏娃問亞當：“你當真愛我嗎？”
Adam said helplessly, "Do I have any other choice?"
亞當無可奈何地回答：“我還有別的選擇嗎？
英語笑話：補衣服
To patch the hole of pants
補衣服
A young man came home from work and found his bride upset. "I feel terrible, "she said. "I was pressing your suit and I burned a big hole in the seat of your trousers.”
一位年輕的丈夫下班回到家里，發現新娘心煩意亂�！拔倚睦锾y受了，她說，我在給你熨西裝時把褲子的臀部燒了個大洞。 ”
"Forget It,n"said her husband. "Remember that l've got an extra pair of pants for that suit．
“沒事兒，”丈夫安慰她說，你忘了我這套衣服有兩條褲子。
"Yes,”said the woman.cheering up. "And it's luckY you have.I used another pants to patch the hole."
”是的，“妻子高興地說，幸虧你還有一條，我后來就用它來補了這個洞了。
我要射死他
A:What would you do if you find your husband date with another woman?
A：如果你發現你丈夫與別的女人約會你會怎么做?
B:lill open one eye and close one eye.
B：我會睜一只眼，閉一只眼。
A:How kind you are!
A:你太善良了！
B：No，I'II shoot him!
B：不，我要射死他
馬打電話來了
A guy is reading his paper when his wife walks up behind him and smacks him on the back of thei head with a frying pan. He asks, "What was that for ?"She says, "I found a piece of paper in your pocket with'Betty Sue'written on it.'Ha says, "Jeez,honey, 'Betty Sue'was the name of the horse I bet on.H She shrugs and walks away.
一個家伙正在看報紙，他的'妻子走到他身后，用一只煎鍋敲他的后腦勺。他問道：“這是為什么？”她說：“我在你口袋里發現了一張寫有‘BettY Sue’的紙條。"他說：¨哎呀，親愛的，‘BettYSue’是我賭的那匹馬的名字�？谒柫寺柤�，走了。
Three days later he's reading his paper when she walks up behind him and smacks him on the back of the head again with the frying pan. He asks, "What was that for?一she answers, "Your horse called."
三天后，他正在看報紙，妻子走到他身后，又用一只煎鍋敲他的后腦勺。他問：這又是為什么？“她答道：-你的馬打電話來了�！�
死于肝癌
Wife:you see. According to the statistics on the paper,80% of those who have died of liver cancer have drunk alcohol.
妻子：你看這張報紙，據統計，死于肝癌的人80%都是喝酒的。
Husband: lt's okay. To my investigation,all these people eat meals.
丈夫：那有什么？據我調查，死于肝癌的人100%都吃飯的。
你精神正常嗎？
Are you a normal person?
你精神正常嗎？
During a visit to the mental asylum,a visitor asked the director, "What is the criterion that defines a patient to be institutionalized?""Well..."said the director, "we fill up a bathtub,and we offer a teaspoon, a teacup,and a bucket to the patient and ask him to empty the bathtub."Oh,I understand,n said the visitor. "A normal person would choose the bucket as it is larger than the spoon or the teacup."Noooooooo! n answered the director. "A normal person would pull the plug."
一個參觀者在參觀一所精神病院的時候問院長，”你們是用什么標準來決定一個人是否應該進精神病院呢？””哦……¨院長說，“是這樣，我們先給一個浴缸放滿水，然后我們給病人一個茶匙，一個茶杯和一個水桶去把浴缸里面的水放清�！芭叮颐靼琢恕�，參觀者說，”正常人會選擇水桶，因為水桶比茶匙和茶杯的容積大�！薄卞e了”，院長回答道，正常人會把浴缸塞子拔掉。
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